Quitting social media

the bittersweet irony of it

The hardest part about quitting certain social media platforms to escape the toxicity, negativity, and shallow connections is realizing you no longer have a place to brag about it—except, of course, on other social media platforms, like Substack's Notes.

Even if you choose to brag about it on your own self-hosted blog, it’s essentially the same thing.

Make no mistake, your blog is social media—a space where you form surface-level connections with complete strangers. Sure, it’s not the toxic cesspool of Facebook or the chaotic moshpit of Twitter, but at the end of the day…it’s still social media.

• The paradox of escape
  Leaving a toxic platform doesn’t guarantee you’ve left social media entirely—it simply reshapes the way you engage with it. Whether it’s Notes, a blog, or another app, the cycle continues in subtler forms.

• Bragging rights and validation loops
  The act of quitting social media often becomes its own statement—a meta flex posted on other platforms. You will find the same likes, shares, or comments elsewhere.

• Surface-level connections persist
  Blogs, alternative and new platforms may seem more wholesome or niche, but they foster the same fleeting relationships with strangers as older social media platforms.

• Shifting the toxicity lens
  While smaller platforms might feel less chaotic, they can still mirror negativity if boundaries aren’t managed. The issues might follow you rather than staying tied to a specific app.

• The real challenge: redefining connection
  Quitting platforms isn’t just about leaving a digital space—it’s about rethinking how you connect with others and defining what meaningful engagement means to you.

Escaping the toxicity of social media isn’t about the platform; it’s about your mindset. If you truly want to break free, focus on you, and not on platform, no matter where it happens.